Inhuman&Different

i thought everything would work out
i believed that without a doubt
then people started to depart
and things started to fall apart
but i carried on without my heart
cuz i know i won't need it when i restart
reborn, renew, redo everything now
back to before things went down south
and now, all i want is a way out
from everyone's thoughts and running mouth
im just thinking aloud, stop me
i'm drawing up blanks, quite vividly
and im just getting rid of excessive creativity
so excuse me at this written work's simplicity
i'm just letting you in at what im thinking
trying to get away from memories of where i've been in
and im sinking
faster than rocks thrown at the lake
faster than spirits at your family's wake
and i'm still awake, two hours past midnight
i'm starting to think my life will never take flight
i got so much dreams, maybe it's keeping me down
trying to hold onto everything that's still around
life's going too fast, i just can't keep up
and in the process, i guess i've fucked up
and they say that diamonds are forever
that they keep on shining, but i'm clever
so i know that they'll eventually lose shine
just like how i'm losing everything that was mine
eternity is just another word for endless time
but eternity is illogical, if it is, then i'm
inhuman for thinking otherwise
i'm a demon in training, so it'd be wise
to keep away from the likes of me
i'm warning you, stay away from me
i'm the shadow that everyone fears
worst of all, they know that i'm here
waiting for someone to ignore my heed
and then i'll introduce them to the world's greed
and they'll need me to guide them
but i'll be leading them to more problems
i despise what i see in the mirror
i'm wishing that things were clearer
that God spoke to me, telling me what to do
and i don't care if you don't believe in Him. i do.
i'm the definition of something illogical
and yet i base my decisions on logic, isn't that comical?
i'm everything that wasn't meant to be
and yet people still fall for what i guess is me
right now, i guess i'm pushing people away
inside, im hoping that they'll want to stay
keep me company while i try to convert
to how i was before i pulled an invert
turned around, changed the course of destiny
all because my mind started to think freely
i'm just letting myself go in my words
and i know, you're thinking, it's all absurd
but it makes perfect sense when i read back
cuz i know the whole story, let's flashback
three years ago, i had dreams of finishing school
never thinking about what to do to look cool
and i still dont, i was quite a nerd
and i still am, but i keep my words unheard
because i'm too different, i'm out of the norm
i'm like that genius kid that stay in his dorm
i thank the few who stick by me
who knows that i'm evil and doesn't mind me
in short, i'm inhuman for being angelo
but then again, that's what they said about leonardo
davinci, vincent vangogh
i'm proud to be different, just so you know.