Letter to You.

Dear Lost Friend,

How are you? I hope things are well.

I know we don't talk anymore.

We don't text or talk on the phone anymore.

But I remember a time where we'd talk and share secrets.

Would it be okay if I told you one more secret?

I don't want to write anymore.

Because everytime I write, I'm reminded of you.

I'm reminded of how you use to ask me to read to you.

Lamely recite you poems over the phone.

Whisper you words, weaved from my mind, to your heart.

You watched in awe as I tried to perfect this art.

Type out stories that you would read before you slept.

Hand written letters that I sent to you, and hope you kept.

Paint you stories as if I was vandalizing the walls of your mind with vivid poetry.

If I could only take back those words because they mean nothing now.

Because those words were covered in feelings that were for your eyes only.

I'd be lying if I said that I never felt a damn thing about you.

But I'm at this point in our relationship that I don't want to admit that I felt anything for you.

It makes things easier to move on and walk away from what we had.

I'm not saying it was all bad.

I just don't want to remember the good times we enjoyed together.

I don't want to remember how much effort I put in to get her.

All the laughter and smiles I would capture with my nikon.

The times where we'd just lie on the grass and watch the clouds float by.

Or drive around town, one hand on the wheel, one hand holding your hand.

I don't want to remember your voice, whispering in my ears.

Secretly telling me of the years we might spend in each other's arms.

I don't want to hear you telling me how you've fallen for my charms.

Or how happy you are that you've met a guy like me.

Or how ecstatic you are that I became a part of your life.

Or how I was so perfect for you.

I saw you on the bus the other day.

I started to panic and shy away.

We ended up spending an hour in each other's presence.

Just sitting, and thinking.

Awkwardly glancing at one another.

And quietly smiling when our eyes meet one another.

I should've said hi.

Seeing you so randomly, like how we first met.

Maybe it was a sign.

It made me realize how much I...

Lesbians you.

I wonder if you do too.

I'm trying to repress all this memory.

So I pretend that you're the enemy.

You tricked me with your empty promises of compromise and everlasting patience.

Caught me off guard and brainwashed me with the help of your secret agents.

Also known as your smile and your eyes.

And I would've died if it wasn't for my necklace of resurection.

But then I lost internet connection.

You would've liked that line.

They say that time heals all, is it really true?

I think time just helped me adjust to how things have become.

And forgetting is the only way that moving on is properly done.

I'm hoping I'm wrong because our memories are stuck on replay.

I guess I'll just have to see in time.

But I'm scared.

That I'll actually move on.

And be happy without you.

That's it, that's my secret.

I hope you treasure this one like the others..

Sincerly Yours,